Love and Hearing Loss: Communication Strategies for Couples

Senior couple with hearing loss drinking morning coffee together

Hearing loss can impact many areas of your day-to-day life. Neglected hearing loss, for instance, can affect your professional life, your favorite hobbies, and even your relationships. For couples who are coping with hearing loss, communication can become strained. Animosity can develop from the increased tension and more frequent quarrels. In other words, left uncontrolled, hearing loss can negatively affect your relationship in significant ways.

So how are relationships impacted by hearing loss? These difficulties occur, in part, because individuals are usually unaware that they even have hearing loss. Hearing loss typically is, after all, a slowly advancing condition. Communication may be strained because of hearing loss and you and your partner may not even be aware it’s the root of the issue. This can lead to both partners feeling alienated and can make it difficult to find workable solutions.

Frequently, a diagnosis of hearing loss along with practical strategies from a hearing specialist can help couples begin communicating again, and better their relationships.

Can hearing loss impact relationships?

It’s really easy to overlook hearing loss when it first presents. Couples can have considerable misunderstandings as a result of this. The following common issues can develop as a result:

  • Arguments: It’s not uncommon for arguments to occur in a relationship, at least, occasionally. But when hearing loss is present, those arguments can be even more aggravating. For some couples, arguments will ignite more often because of an increase in misunderstandings. For others, an increase in arguments could be a consequence of changes in behavior (for example, boosting the volume on the television to painful levels).
  • Couples often confuse hearing loss for “selective hearing”: Selective hearing is what happens when someone hears “we’re having cake for dessert” very clearly, but somehow does not hear “we need to take out the garbage before we eat”. In some instances, selective hearing is a conscious action, in other cases, it’s quite unintended. Spouses will frequently start to miss particular words or phrases or these words and phrases will sound garbled when one of them has hearing loss. This can often be mistaken for “selective hearing,” causing resentment and tension in the relationship.
  • Feeling ignored: When someone doesn’t respond to what you say, you’re likely to feel disregarded. When one of the partners has hearing loss but is oblivious of it, this can frequently take place. Feeling as if your partner isn’t paying attention to you is not good for long-term relationship health.
  • Intimacy may suffer: In lots of relationships, communication is the cornerstone of intimacy. This can cause a rift to build up between the partners. Increased tension and frustration are frequently the consequence.

These issues will often begin before anyone is diagnosed with hearing loss. If somebody doesn’t know that hearing loss is at the root of the issue, or if they are ignoring their symptoms, feelings of resentment could get worse.

Living with a person who is dealing with loss of hearing

How do you live with a person who is dealing with hearing loss when hearing loss can create so much conflict? This will only be an issue for couples who aren’t willing to develop new communication strategies. Here are a few of those strategies:

  • Help your partner get used to their hearing aids: This can include things like taking over tasks that cause significant anxiety (such as going shopping or making phone calls). There also might be ways you can help your partner get accustomed to their hearing aids and we can assist you with that.
  • When you repeat what you said, try making use of different words: When your partner doesn’t hear what you said, you will typically try repeating yourself. But instead of using the same words over and over again, try changing things up. Hearing loss can impact some frequencies of speech more than others, which means certain words might be more difficult to understand (while others are easier). Your message can be reinforced by changing the words you utilize.
  • Patience: This is especially true when you know that your partner is struggling with hearing loss. You may have to repeat yourself more frequently or vary the volume of your voice. It may also be necessary to talk in a slower cadence. The effectiveness of your communication can be dramatically improved by exercising this type of patience.
  • Encourage your partner to come in for a hearing exam: Your partner’s hearing loss can be controlled with our help. When hearing loss is well-managed, communication is typically more effective (and many other areas of stress may go away also). Additionally, managing hearing loss is a safety concern: hearing loss can impact your ability to hear the telephone, smoke detectors and fire alarms, and the doorbell. You might also fail to hear oncoming traffic. We can help your partner better control any of these potential concerns.
  • As much as you can, try to look directly into the face of the person you’re talking with: For someone who is dealing with hearing loss, face-to-face communication can give an abundance of visual cues. Your partner will be able to make use of facial cues and body language. It’s also easier to preserve concentration and eye contact. This supplies your partner with more information to process, and that usually makes it easier to understand your intent.

After you get diagnosed, then what?

A hearing test is a fairly simple, non-invasive experience. Usually, you will simply put on a set of headphones and listen for specific tones. But a hearing loss diagnosis can be an important step to more successfully managing symptoms and relationships.

Encouraging your partner to touch base with us can help ensure that hearing loss doesn’t sabotage your happiness or your partnership.

The site information is for educational and informational purposes only and does not constitute medical advice. To receive personalized advice or treatment, schedule an appointment.